Kim Porter has revealed more details about her decade long on-again, off-again relationship with Sean “Diddy” Combs.
The rude awakening came late last year while Porter was expecting the couple’s twin daughters, D’Lila Star and Jessie James, when a friend told her that Combs had a baby with another woman.
“I wasn’t even coming from the place of who, what, why,” Porter tells Essence magazine. “I laid low and did what women do: I did my background work, collected information [about the other woman]. But I wasn’t even on it like that because I was pregnant, and what was bubbling inside me was a blessing from God. I couldn’t let my energy be on that. I didn’t have time for any drama, trauma and bull—-.”
The woman in question is Sarah Chapman who had a baby five months before the twins arrived.
Says Porter, “It’s not an original script. He’s not the first man who’s cheated. He’s not the first man who’s had a baby outside of his relationship. He’s not the originator of this. But at this point in my life – I have girls now – it’s a different program.”
Porter’s biggest regret is that Diddy didn’t tell her about the child himself. “I would have preferred to find out from him because that’s a man,” she says. “I know it’s hard for anyone to say to their significant other, ‘I’ve gotten into some s— and I got a baby on the way.’ But men do get caught up in things; I’m not naive to that. Still, there’s a right and a wrong way to handle it. Because, most of all, we were friends. Even if I couldn’t have understood it as a woman, I would have understood it as a friend.” (Diddy did ultimately tell her about the child after their twins were born.)
“He told me that he may have gotten himself into a situation and he may have fathered another child outside the relationship and I said, ‘Really? Well, I already knew. I’m glad you decided to be a man,’ ” says Porter. “I was like, ‘Dude, this is so wack I can’t even respect you right now.’ And for me, once the respect is gone, I’m not even listening to you.”
Although the baby was a contributing factor, Porter says she left did because the relationship was no longer working for her.
“As Black women we sacrifice,” Porter says. “We stand by our man, through thick and thin, through whatever. But if you feel like, ‘Maybe I am getting the short end of the stick,’ that’s when a change has to take place.
“I’m a Southern girl, and my home life is numero uno,” she says. “I wasn’t waking up feeling happy. There’s no other way for me to articulate it, other than a feeling. I just wasn’t feeling it, that’s why I had to leave.”
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I’ll tell you this, Kim isn’t the only woman who has gotten pregnant by a man who wasn’t her husband and she certainly isn’t the only woman who has been cheated on and ended up with a step kid on the side. I got pregnant with my first kid and wasn’t married to the guy but I didn’t stay with him because I felt like he would take care of me or my kid. I had to set boundaries and he decided he wanted to do his thing so I left him.
Once things changed and he realized the bigger picture, we got married. But Kim dear, until you are married, you really aren’t exclusive to anyone so lets get over the dramatics really. I believe strongly in marital vows for spiritual reasons and I believe that if God joins two together that no man can break them apart. I say that because there will be folks who think that getting married doesn’t stop men from cheating and men with no spiritual conviction this may be true but a man who is grounded in the word will not step out on his wife.
But as my momma used to say, if you giving the milk already then no need for the man to marry the cow….. We need to wise up women, kids do not make a man stay, that’s just the bottom line. If you don’t set boundaries prior to entering a relationship, don’t think you can set some afterwards. Men respect women who have rules and stick to them. If they get away with it once then they lose respect for you so forget thinking they’ll act right.
I don’t know who the black women are that stands by their man through thick and thin…Please!! Black women are some of the most venomous, argumentive, selfish women I know. I could have added a few more descriptions but time will not allow. This coming from a black man. However, I emphasize, not all black women but enough of them.
LET’S WAKE UP LADIES. KIM PORTER CONTINUES TO HAVE BABIES WITH A MAN THAT CHOOSES NOT TO MARRY HER. KIM IS NOT A STUPID WOMAN AND THIS IS HER CHOICE. P DIDDY HAS DEMONSTRATED TO KIM THAT HE IS NOT HER ONE AND ONLY (REMEMBER J LO?) SO HE HAS CHEATED BEFORE AND PROBABLY WILL AGAIN AND SHE SEEMS TO ACCEPT ALL OF THIS SO WHY SHOULD DIDDY STOP.
Let’s be serious. Kim doesn’t give two cares who diddy messes with on the side, front, or behind. This lady will probably have three more kids by him (or another famous man) She is no fool. She has that man right where she wants him for all time. In her bank book. She has three kids by him and another by Al B Sure. She knew exactly what was going on and she allows it because those children allow her to live a lifestyle she would not be privilege to do if her children’s fathers were not wealthy. As long as those child support checks keep coming in she is going to continue to be with diddy and will probably have more children by him!!
[...] “As Black women we sacrifice. We stand by our man, through thick and thin, through whatever. But if you feel like, ‘Maybe I am getting the short end of the stick,’ that’s when a change has to take place. – source [...]
Diddy is the personification of Black males- a baby daddy. He gets these woman pregnant but never marries them and doesn’t live in the same home with any of his children. Amazingly he thinks he is a good daddy because he shows up every few weeks to take pics for the paparazzi and drop off a check. Sarah and Kim are Diddy’s victims.
Jennifer got out in time and has since been engaged twice and married once. Had she stayed with Diddy he would still be “promising” to marry her. Jennifer also revealed he cheated on her and Kim Porter verified that it was her he was cheating with.
Cassie better get out now. Oh wait she is poor- she will get knocked up first and then Diddy will just walk away like he does all the women he impregnates.
Diddy id just keeping with tradition though as the Black community is basically single women abandoned by boys like Diddy and probably Marcus too.
wow I didn’t know cassie was wit Diddy dag learn suntin new ery day.Yeah blackmen aren’t all cheater’s and not all black sistah have children outo f wedlock. For the puffies of the world God has something for them and the Kim’s.All is forgiven if it is asked.Who am I to judge.I say the both make beautiful children thou.also Kim has it made AlB sure deons’t even dill with his son Diddy adopted Quincy so kim is gettin 4 child support checks. the only deal that was made at adoption was Quincy would keep his last name Brown.
A man is going to do what a man is going to do-simple. If it’s not in a man to be faithful and true, then it’s not going to happen. I was married to an upstanding military man for 18 years, and he started cheating on me from day one. I waited for him to grow up, become mature, be the man I needed and could count on, but it never happened. So, after 18 years of a toxic and self-destructive, self-deprecating, marriage, I gave up. I filed for divorce, and have not looked back. To this day, he is still drinking, lying, running women, and not doing all the things he should be doing. God bless him, God bless me, and God bless my children for a new and better life. Kim did right leaving. Diddy is 39 years old, and he is still making the same mistakes that he made in his 20’s.
Yea I’m late… So what lol
I would comment on what Marcus said but that’s typcial and we can’t change it. We can fault black men all we want… but the honest truth is it is our fault. You can blame whomever you want to blame but it’s our fault. Who raised these black men?
Stop telling little man that he’s gonna be a “heartbreaker” when he grows up with a smile on your face. *That tells them that sub-consciously you think it’s a good thing to have multiple ladies and that this will make you proud.
We keep giving our children mixed signals and wonder why they don’t respect us when they grow up. Sometimes we need to point the finger at ourselves and not everybody else.
Kim is a fool. Who has three kids by the same man, he adopts your eldest son (by another well-known entertainer), lives with him and isn’t married?
C’Mon Man